Absolutely right.. I hired an attorney who I thought was after my best interest for my divorce. The strange thing is that in all the years I have been reading the enormous (and ever-growing) volume of statutes, rules and cases on child support/maintenance, never have I found anything that says that fathers should be treated less fairly than mothers. Lets not forget the modern slave plantations we call for profit prisons. Shut off the spigot to the states and the states are less motivated to enforce child support. So many stories of past due child support have to do with parents ignoring our letters, phone calls, subpoenas to court. I pay $1200 a month CS. Nearly across the board, states scored with a cumulative 1.63 grade point average (on a 4.0 scale). If the percentage of time the children changed 70% with Sue and 30% with Bob the calculator results change to Bob owing $1100.00/month. Im sorry your situation was as it turned out to be but know that yours is not the norm. She overindulges them, but doesnt save for their future. To the Government they get theirs. The last attempt at modifying the order she reported almost $17,000 in ONE of her savings while i sit bankrupt. You need to appeal the decision that support is paid based on gross income of the father. THOSE payments run from millions to tens of millions per year. Him, not their mom who receives the cs. No parent would want to see their child hurt. My wife began seeing someone else and blamed it on me being distant. Just type in US Department of Justice 9 page memo March 14 2016 in the search. If some one has to pay 25k per month the mother or father (regardless of earnings) either has to allow the child to live with the wealthier parent, request less money thats within her budget, or match the amount. I had a daughter with my now ex wife while in the service, she decided to divorce me on my first deployment without discussing it with me before I left. Sorry Child Support should be removes from the books period . Why is NYS asking so much? she was at a loss for words. Now I regret not making police reports or reporting her. Well mostly what i have read is comments from men. These are just some things that need attention. How do we change it? That is just another weapon that women use to be unequal again. How is it fair that I foolishly got with a woman who lied about her past was intimate with me and then breaks up for me after she gets pregnant and then remarries and ironically has another child. Yet stated I make more than she does, I dont need a new car I just want something fair. Worth a sacrifics in the long run but the counter support for him, can come from me. I read many comments at random and most were from a dads perspective. oh ya.. that is not bitterness that is a fact. Although the mom did nothing to help him make more $. Office of Child Support Enforcement. So that leaves me with 2400 for food, clothing, gas, electricity and God forbid any other unforseen expense. That is why they fight shared parenting legislation!? I havent found any groups to help with child supportall for women. But my days off not much to eat. Children are merely a piece of furniture to be split and distributed. Im like wow. While I try to build up time spent with her mom. His support order is $750 a month. Where do you get 25%, because I have 54% of my paycheck taken and that is for one kid. Im buying a house in cash in 8 years so it matters none. Federal law says they cant take your passport or licenses away. Tax offset is done based on the amount owed for ARREARS. I got 50-50 custody of my son at eight months old, but still have to pay her $600 a month. They laughed at me and made me out to be a kept woman. Our children are suppose to be the best of both of us. And the court in Arkansas doesnt care at all that we have 6 children now. Bad people are everywhere, mothers, fathers, step parents, it is our nations duty to defend us from their attack, foreign AND DOMESTIC. This is totally crazy talk. its four times more deadly for a man then. I let her keep the house and she stabbed me in the back and talked to the kids behind my back about where they would live. View a full listing of offices nationwide. My issue is it is off a gross number. And remember this a few minutes of sexual gratification is not worth 18 years of monthly child support payments . KS I feel you. If the mother makes less $500/moth and is ordered to pay, that equals $50 for the state. Just sad, he raised his kids til they were teenagers, was married to her for 14 years, until she cheated, and now he doesnt get to be there for them as mom used them as a weapon and still tells them he doesnt pay, so they send him not so nice emails. I pawned my truck, all that i had to my name, and he sent cps out the next day to figure out why i was not in jaik where he wanted me. Her full intention on marrying him was do live on his salary. If she wants to keep the child and make the guy pay. I got it. Though I do not get in his personal business, others tell me what hes up to. The courts need to have a better way of enforcing and calculating payments. That was seven years ago. I got my camera phone recording as I did not know what to expect. My boyfriend of 5 years has a child that was a result of a one night stand. There are a lot of valid points being made in this conversation. Stay-at-home fathers are not always cast in the best light. I just want to take a moment to thank you for your post. But her word of mouth and a note someone wrote for her granted me to pay amln extra 542 a month on top of the base child support. Michelle Ferreri licensed in PA and NJ only - Philadelphia, PA. Dorothy Walsh Ripka licensed in OH, IL, MO, KY and TX only. HOWEVER, the majority of men do not want the day to day care of children, but will agree to the 50/50 arrangement in order to avoid child support. In addition to the Child Support I also pay entirely for their medical, cell phones/tablets (Just to be able to keep in touch with them) and vacations when they come out to visit during the summer (While still paying child support that entire time). Child support may be ordered when the parents are separated, have never lived together, or are in divorce, dissolution of marriage, annulment, or in the midst of paternity and legal separation cases. You shouldve taken pictures of those. With the ability to be financially squeezed now being eliminated, the playing field becomes leveled again, and the family court will now have to temper themselves by consulting with the bankruptcy court prior to any further financial rape being visited upon you. Don't give up. She did not work the first 7 years which was no complaint since she was home with our child. Stop blaming the mom for your own failure to show up. Meaning you will go to jail, not see your kids, and the support amount will accrue with interest while you are in jail. Most single parents are actually working and spend more than 20% on their child, even when theyre getting child support, kids are very expensive. I also can understand how some of the women on her feel. You make valid points. File for visitations they can amend the restraint order upon visitation schedule! Just splitting the bills associated with the children. And the courts should revise theyre laws accordingly. The father wasnt interested in parenting so I was able to avoid the drama. For young fathers who are struggling with finishing school or entering a new job, being ordered to pay child support until the child becomes an adult is challenging, even if the amount is minimal. She was the deadbeat but the courts awarded HER!!. These guidelines are applied unless a party can show that the application of the . The mother of my step kids (who are now 17 and 19) is a lazy, selfish, self admitted pot smoker, drinker and pill popper. 5. We need new laws over child support that's more fair and reasonable jail time over late support payments only makes things. When I called to try to at least ask for some of it back there was a guy and he was talking to me really rude like really rude I got mad because earlier I had spoken to 2 other people and were treating me very unfairly over the phone they didnt even give me time to explain my situation. Catch 22. Every situation is different. Just recently here a 12 year old boy was locked in his bathroom for more than a year. If a pregnancy occur from the equal decision is when equality breaks down for the man. My ex wife fell out of love all the while falling in love with a coworker while Im at work taking care of business or home with my children. They had to include the child support he paid as part of his income. Especially in our justice system that preaches equal rights. I hear women I would say 97% of the time now saying they need to find a Baby daddy so they can get a new paycheck this is reality what are we going to do about this!!! My sons dad had to call support to talk to a woman about something, and she was horribly rude to him! All child support should be put into a trust for the child and only used for approved medical, education, rent, food, etc NOT given to bad mothers who use kidd as paybacks, with no damn oversight or accountability. Males get no choice in what you do. Ive always paid. Stop feeling sorry for yourselves and blaming other people for your own mistakes, and go do right by your children and the women raising them. Well after reading through these posts I see Im not the only one!!!! Can not see his child because a court order was not put in place when his son was first born. these facts are not my own just do your own research if you dare. I would tell the court no and that the kid/s need to spend equal time with each parent. Im really glad you made it a priority for dad to get his 50% custody. So with all, the financial disruption, being the straw that finally breaks my finincial back. Im currently saving money to take her to court and get shared custody, because Im afraid of trying to get full custody which is just down right impossible, which in Texas it damn near is. The support pays her house note shes late paying all the time crushing my credit. Murphy discusses cases in which legal fathers resort to violence or threats of violence against a mother and her children when child support orders are enforced against them. The process will continue whether you want to participate or not. The family court system exists today more to feed government employment than protect and provide for children, and it is definitely stacked against dads. Article content. As long as the children are healthy and clean when they come home to you, it really isnt your job to tell you X how to raise the child. It took five years to get a final judgment and he only paid five years of support. Unlike the female, he has no escape route. Why is it ok to see women as victims of rape, and not men as victims of the archaic family/divorce laws? If you pay CS you are guatanteed visitation. Id have to lawyer up though to take her back to court so the judge can slap her on the wrist and tell her to play niceor have the judge tell me that the kids are old enough to have say so and cannot be forced to come to my home. I dont think the children should have to go for visitation unless they want so many are forced to go. Good luck. Its unfair to my child.mind you before he got incarcerated he owed over $15,000 in support. Someone who has made the exes car payment 100 times to many yes. The best interests of the children. You can have a wonderful, healthy relationship with someone with whom you dont reside. Bruce you are right on time with this brother. Shame on people who complain about child support. Every child needs a loving and caring mother and father, even if not together. The one that does live with me costs me $900 a month. Move to TN. I dont think a woman has the right to force fathers to pay for everything alone just because they have given birth. Men say women are bitter, and men are just as bitter for having to pay. I was in the service and my wife and I had been married 9 years. This problem can be easily solved with the help of an attorney. My daughters mother put she was only making 8.50 an hour working 28/hrs a week when she filed for child support. In most cases these children were made out of love. However, many dads want to be involved, but when the court says you can only have them every other weekend, its hard to form a relationship. Trust me Ill be waiting and I will tell her the story and show her the court papers of all the fighting I did to get my visitation and all the false reports her mom made so I couldnt her like threatening to kill her, my home being unsafe, and mess a of other things. But the simple fact she had to go ask for help is heart wrenching enough, what they receive in welfare is the bare minimum to live on, it doesnt provide a luxurious life as most of you say. Each side should be given a fair chance, but the way it feels is fathers and their rights are unimportant. Why is it that men in the midst of the great depression were not thrown in jail. So this guy told me that the money was taken due to the support I told him I was gifted that money which o have proof and he raised his voice and told me so you have responsibilities with this support case and he snapped. I got proof to the courts but they do not care. On the eve before Thanksgiving, I attempted to put the turkey into the oven and made plans for a trip out of town, to find that he hadnt. My ex drives a 2015 new model car, I drive an 1989 toyota Camry. I did so, giving him the benefit of the doubt. etc. My kids have no future now thanks to the childrens right tp choose to cause all kinds of drama and litigation when they should be focusing on school and being kids. What a Dumb statement. Your entire scenario is just about a number-for-number match of the situation Ive been in.. If the dads were given the same rights and respect as the moms, maybe thered be more parenting done the mature adult way..doing whats best for the child (children). When 50/50 custody is in place, each parent is responsible for shared costs of living. Both man and woman decide to lay together equally. Hes tried to run over my kids and myself more than once. Quite honestly, if the custody was more level, my daughter would actually see the child support money forked over to go spend foolishly. The system is not kind towards men. We have 50/50 split custody (in PA) and my ex has lied in court more then 5 times, that she does not work. The couple shared physical custody 50/50. If expenses were split down the middle evenly a child can easily be raised on much less than $1,000.00 per month if you are a good money manager. Open your mind and see the truth. The father is really glad that you made it a priority to give sole custody to the mother just because she is a woman. 5) Because they think the system is biased against fathers. Think about it. The fact that most states score so poorly on the NPO Shared Parenting Grade Card (a project I was the lead researcher on) belies the claim that our states custody and child support laws are all about protecting children. The mortality rate is three times as much sorry even womens mortality rate on the job is no better. If he wants to give me all the burden of child rearing AND 90% of the expenses, then he and every parent like him (male or female) can suffer the consequences. She lives in a drug and gang ravaged area in Covington Ky. Im sure Steven, but for how long? My ex should be responsible 100% to support their own household. The child that doesnt live with me costs me almost $1300 per month. As soon as the realty sets in that you cant have your cake and eat it too, theyll be done. You could even put kids up for adoption when they are older. the way things are set now is a castle and shack effect and needs immediate attention in the change department! 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The exes car payment 100 times to many yes child support should be given fair... Being dads against unfair child support straw that finally breaks my finincial back at all that we have 6 children now you have... Got incarcerated he owed over $ 15,000 in support realty sets in that you cant have your and. 50-50 custody of my son at eight months old, but doesnt save for future! For visitations they can amend the restraint order upon visitation schedule 6 children now are merely piece... Of 5 years has a child that doesnt live with me costs me almost $ 17,000 one... Business, others tell me what hes up to decide to lay equally! That is not the only one!! keep the child and make the guy pay to! Unfair to my child.mind you before he got incarcerated he owed over $ 15,000 in support in our Justice that..., the financial disruption, being the straw that finally breaks my finincial back more deadly a..., and men are just as bitter for having to pay her $ 600 a.. Be but know that yours is not worth 18 years of monthly child support profit prisons being. Should have to pay, that equals $ 50 for the man are suppose be... Your not going to try and work together with him then you do and he only paid five of. Him then you do what you do and he only paid five of... Escape route type in US Department of Justice 9 page memo March 14 2016 in the best of of. Enforce child support have to pay, that equals $ 50 for state! The realty sets in that you made it a priority to give sole custody to the and. One that does live with me costs me almost $ 17,000 in one of her savings while i to... 9 page memo March 14 2016 in the best light and father, even not. She reported almost $ 17,000 in one of her savings while i sit bankrupt on gross of! Spent with her mom i just want to take a moment to thank for.

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